http://kinseyconfidential.org Just another WordPress weblog Thu, 18 Mar 2010 14:00:23 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 en hourly 1 2006-2007 aschweig@indiana.edu (Kinsey Confidential) aschweig@indiana.edu (Kinsey Confidential) posts 1440 Just another WordPress weblog Kinsey Confidential Kinsey Confidential aschweig@indiana.edu No no http://kinseyconfidential.org/wp-content/themes/kinsey/images/kinsey-podcast-300.jpg http://kinseyconfidential.org 144 144 http://kinseyconfidential.org/penetrative-sex-pergnant/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/penetrative-sex-pergnant/#comments Thu, 05 Nov 2009 14:00:05 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1256 http://kinseyconfidential.org/penetrative-sex-pergnant/feed/ 1 http://kinseyconfidential.org/vaginal-pain-sex/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/vaginal-pain-sex/#comments Mon, 12 Oct 2009 13:00:07 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1235 http://kinseyconfidential.org/vaginal-pain-sex/feed/ 1 3:04 Many Women Deal With Vaginal Pain As many as 10 to 15% of women experience chronic genital pain issues which can greatly impair daily activities, such ... Many Women Deal With Vaginal Pain As many as 10 to 15% of women experience chronic genital pain issues which can greatly impair daily activities, such as riding in a car, wearing tight clothing or sitting down at work all day. Genital pain can also make sex feel very painful. Some women who experience genital pain only feel pain at the moment of sexual penetration whereas others feel it during a range of sexual activities. Even genital touching or cunnilingus can be painful for some women. Doctors Are Still Learning Unfortunately, many healthcare providers have not received adequate training in issues related to genital pain. Research related to genital pain is relatively new with the vast majority of the research having been conducted only in the past decade. As a result, women who experience genital pain may be best served by seeing a healthcare provider who has significant expertise in diagnosing and treating conditions such as vulvodynia, which means ldquo;vulvar painrdquo;. The vulva is the word use to describe the outside parts of a womanrsquo;s genitals. Find More Information The National Vulvodynia Association is a patient advocacy group that supports research related to genital pain. They also maintain a list of healthcare providers who have experience diagnosing and treating women with such problems. You might try contacting the NVA through their web site, which is www.nva.org, to find out if there is an expert in your area that your wife can go to see. In addition, although there are real, physical causes of genital pain, therersquo;s no doubt that genital pain can have difficult influences on a couplersquo;s relationship. Many women feel guilty for being unable to pleasure their partner in the way that they would like to. Often times, womenrsquo;s partners feel frustrated at the lack of intimacy, too, and may find it difficult to let go during sex lest they end up unintentionally hurting their partner. Sex therapy can help couples communicate in helpful ways about sex and work together to find ways of being intimate in pleasurable, connecting ways. You can find a sex therapist in your area through the web site of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research which is www.sstarnet.org. Content,Type,,Pleasure,,Orgasm,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/anal-sex-cleanliness-pain/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/anal-sex-cleanliness-pain/#comments Mon, 07 Sep 2009 14:00:32 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://wfiutest.rtv.indiana.edu/?p=1181 http://kinseyconfidential.org/anal-sex-cleanliness-pain/feed/ 0 3:00 Although many women and men engage in anal sex, it is still considered a taboo topic in many social circles. As a result, people rarely ... Although many women and men engage in anal sex, it is still considered a taboo topic in many social circles. As a result, people rarely talk to each other about anal sex, which can leave many people feeling confused or uncertain about how to try this particular sexual behavior about which they may feel curious. Because anal sex involves the rectum, some people ndash; like you ndash; have concerns about cleanliness. You may want to take your time to ease into anal play so that you can become more comfortable sharing this part of your body with your boyfriend and making sure that you both feel comfortable with what you are doing. Many couples, for example, experiment with using their fingers for anal play before ever trying anal sex, involving a manrsquo;s penis. By starting with finger penetration, you can take the time to become comfortable not only with the feelings and sensations related to anal penetration, but you can also explore issues related to cleanliness. Cleanliness Often, people find that it is enough to take a shower before having anal sex or to gently dab their anal area with a soft, wet cloth. Other people feel more comfortable using an enema before they have anal sex. This involves inserting fluids into the anus in order to expel feces from the body. Enemas can often be purchased from local drug stores or on the internet. If you decide to experiment with anal fingering first, consider putting a lubricated condom on over your own or your partnerrsquo;s finger before inserting it into your or his anus. Many people find that it is more comfortable if they add additional water-based or silicone-based lubricant to their condom covered finger. As you become more comfortable with anal fingering, you may feel more comfortable trying anal play using sex toys or anal sex involving your partnerrsquo;s penis. Learning More Itrsquo;s important to know that anal sex should not be painful. If it is painful, you should stop. You can also try it again later that day, on another day or not at all depending on your interests and those of your partner. To learn more about safer, pleasurable anal play, check out Because It Feels Good: A Womanrsquo;s Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction. Content,Type,,Pleasure,,Orgasm,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/vibrator-pain/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/vibrator-pain/#comments Mon, 16 Mar 2009 14:00:27 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://wfiutest.rtv.indiana.edu/?p=882 http://kinseyconfidential.org/vibrator-pain/feed/ 0 2:53 There are numerous causes of pain during intercourse and this is definitely something that you should ask your healthcare provider about if the pain or ... There are numerous causes of pain during intercourse and this is definitely something that you should ask your healthcare provider about if the pain or discomfort continue, or if it bothers you. Vibrators are commonly used by women and men, and they are rarely associated with negative side effects such as discomfort, pain or injury. Negative Side Effects That said, vaginal sex, anal sex and masturbation ndash; with or without a vibrator ndash; can all result in negative side effects such as genital itching, burning, irritation or tearing. Mostly a personrsquo;s risk of such side effects depends not only on how they are having sex, but also what their personal health status is like. For example, some women find that they are particularly prone to tearing if they have certain genital skin disorders or if their genital skin is thin, as occurs during times of low estrogen, such as menopause. Vaginal Tears If you have accidentally caused tears in your vagina, they will likely heal on their own within a matter of days, provided you donrsquo;t keep irritating them through partnered sex or masturbation. Once vaginal tears are healed, however, women can usually return to their usual preferred sexual behaviors. The risk of getting small vaginal tears, often called micro-tears, can be reduced by spending more time enhancing your arousal before starting penetration, or by using a store-bought lubricant for masturbation or partner sex. That said, it could also just be a coincidence that you experienced pain around the time that you used a vibrator and then had sex. There are many different reasons why a woman might experience discomfort or pain, including medical conditions, and Irsquo;d encourage you to check in with your healthcare provider. Annual pelvic exams are recommended for all women who are sexually active or who are at least 18 years old, whichever comes first. Learn More To learn more about womenrsquo;s sexual health issues, check out Our Bodies, Ourselves: A New Edition for a New Era. Bodies,,Content,Type,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/pain-sex-partner-large-penis/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/pain-sex-partner-large-penis/#comments Thu, 12 Feb 2009 14:00:09 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://wfiutest.rtv.indiana.edu/?p=855 http://kinseyconfidential.org/pain-sex-partner-large-penis/feed/ 0 2:52 Yes, it is always possible that pain during sex is being caused by a physical problem or a medical condition. The best way to find ... Yes, it is always possible that pain during sex is being caused by a physical problem or a medical condition. The best way to find out what the cause of your discomfort might be is to check in with your healthcare provider for a gynecological exam. It is generally recommended that women who are 18 years old, or who have been sexually active, start having annual gynecological exams anyway, so why not start now? If you don't already have a healthcare provider, ask your mother, another female family member (such as an aunt or cousin) or a good friend for a recommendation. You can also find a local Planned Parenthood clinic in your area by visiting their web site and learning about their women's health care services. If your partner has a large penis, the discomfort and pain may truly be as a result of the fit between your two bodies. Often this can be eased by using a store-bought lubricant for intercourse. If you two are using latex condoms, you will want to use a water-based lubricant or a silicone-based lubricant, both of which are condom-compatible. Using a lubricant can reduce the risk of the condom tearing and at the same time, it can make sex feel more comfortable and more pleasurable. You can put a small dab of lubricant around your vaginal entrance. In addition, you might apply some lubricant to the outside of the condom once it is already on your partner's penis. If you are not using condoms, you can apply the lubricant directly to his penis before starting intercourse. Sometimes women find that choosing positions, such as woman-on-top, that provide a woman with more control over penetration can make sex more comfortable. Other times, spending more time in foreplay to promote sexual arousal, which creates more room in the vagina in terms of both length and width, can help to increase comfort, too. In some cases, however, vaginal pain is caused by a medical problem. You can learn more about vaginal and vulvar pain on the web site of the National Vulvodynia Association. Common,Problems,,Content,Type,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/small-vagina-have-comfortable-sex/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/small-vagina-have-comfortable-sex/#comments Mon, 27 Oct 2008 14:00:40 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://wfiutest.rtv.indiana.edu/?p=402 http://kinseyconfidential.org/small-vagina-have-comfortable-sex/feed/ 0 3:09 Having intercourse for the first time is a big step for many women, and can feel both exciting and anxiety-provoking as one thinks about the ... Having intercourse for the first time is a big step for many women, and can feel both exciting and anxiety-provoking as one thinks about the potential for pleasure as well as whether it will feel uncomfortable or hurt. Some women, like you, find that when they try to have intercourse, it feels near-impossible, which can feel leave women and their partners feeling frustrated and unsure about what to do. Possible Treatments The first step I would suggest is to return to your gynecologist to learn more about what she or he means when they've said that you have a very small vagina. Some women have anatomical issues that make penetration particularly difficult and your doctor may want to suggest a certain treatment or procedure that can make it easier for you to have intercourse. One relatively common treatment strategy involves using a vaginal dilator set, which you can sometimes buy directly through a healthcare provider or sex therapist, or you can order them online. Dilators sort of look like dildos in the sense that they are somewhat cylindrical, but they come in sets of about 4 to 6 and range in sizes. Often women are encouraged to try using the smallest dilator first which is about the size of a pinky finger. One can insert the dilator with some water-based lubricant and then leave it in, or you can try moving it in and out, similar to intercourse. When the smallest size has become easy and comfortable to use, women may try the next smallest size, repeat the process and eventually move to try larger sizes that are similar to the size, for example, of their partner's penis. Recommended Sex Positions In terms of positions, woman-on-top is sometimes easier because it allows for a woman to take in only as much of her partner as she feels comfortable with, and at a pace that feels right to her. You may find that you need to use more lubricant than you initially expected too, and that it is easier if you apply lubricant to both his and your genitals. Even with these sex tips, however, it is still recommended to check in with your healthcare provider as a first step as he or she can examine your body and give more personalized suggestions. Bodies,,Content,Type,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/virginity-overcoming-uncomfortable-sex/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/virginity-overcoming-uncomfortable-sex/#comments Mon, 23 Jun 2008 22:18:26 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://www.kinseyconfidential.org/2008/06/23/qa-virginity-and-overcoming-uncomfortable-sex/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/virginity-overcoming-uncomfortable-sex/feed/ 0 3:12 The realities of having vaginal intercourse for the first time hardly ever match the romanticized Hollywood versions of sex. In fact, you are not alone ... The realities of having vaginal intercourse for the first time hardly ever match the romanticized Hollywood versions of sex. In fact, you are not alone in your experience of feeling like yoursquo;re ready for sex, trying to have it, and then finding that your body just wonrsquo;t cooperate. Medical or Psychological Reasons Sometimes there are medical or physiological reasons why vaginal intercourse may feel difficult or even impossible for a woman. Women who are thinking about becoming sexually active would be well advised to check in with a healthcare provider for a gynecological exam, and this might be a good time for you to do so. That way, not only can you ask your healthcare provider whether you have any personal medical issues that may be making it difficult or uncomfortable for you to have sex, but you can also ask your healthcare provider any questions that you may have about pregnancy, birth control, or sexually transmissible infections ndash; also called STIs. Feeling Comfortable Itrsquo;s also important to note that just because you were recently feeling ready to have sex with your boyfriend, doesnrsquo;t mean that you have to feel ready now. If you are dreading the thought of him touching you now, it is probably worth examining that. You might ask yourself what you need to feel more comfortable with him, whether or not you have sex, and how you are about your relationship together. Couples ndash; even those that have been together for a very long time - sometimes find that their feelings for each other, and those related to sex, ebb and flow. Itrsquo;s okay to feel one way today and another way tomorrow. Spend some time paying attention to your feelings and communicate with him about issues that are important to you. Communicate With Your Partner This might also be a good time to share feelings and thoughts with each other about birth control, condoms, STIs, personal values related to sex, as well as your expectations for sex, and how you think your relationship might change when you have sex together. When you decide that you are ready to try to have sex again ndash; whether it is with him or someone else ndash; feeling relaxed and spending time in foreplay, as you did, and communicating with each other are indeed key features of comfortable sex. Depending on how your bodies fit together, you may find that using a personal lubricant can ease penetration as well. Bodies,,Content,Type,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/vaginal-bleeding-during-sex/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/vaginal-bleeding-during-sex/#comments Wed, 23 Aug 2006 20:59:21 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://www.kinseyconfidential.org/blog/2006/08/23/qa-what-caused-vaginal-bleeding-during-sex/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/vaginal-bleeding-during-sex/feed/ 2