http://kinseyconfidential.org Just another WordPress weblog Thu, 18 Mar 2010 14:00:23 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 en hourly 1 2006-2007 aschweig@indiana.edu (Kinsey Confidential) aschweig@indiana.edu (Kinsey Confidential) posts 1440 Just another WordPress weblog Kinsey Confidential Kinsey Confidential aschweig@indiana.edu No no http://kinseyconfidential.org/wp-content/themes/kinsey/images/kinsey-podcast-300.jpg http://kinseyconfidential.org 144 144 http://kinseyconfidential.org/pain-during-sex-first-time/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/pain-during-sex-first-time/#comments Mon, 29 Dec 2008 14:00:28 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://wfiutest.rtv.indiana.edu/?p=485 http://kinseyconfidential.org/pain-during-sex-first-time/feed/ 0 3:25 A woman's first experience, or first several experiences, with vaginal intercourse are sometimes uncomfortable and, occasionally, may even be painful. If a woman has never before ... A woman's first experience, or first several experiences, with vaginal intercourse are sometimes uncomfortable and, occasionally, may even be painful. If a woman has never before had vaginal penetration such as with her own or a partner's fingers, a sex toy or even a tampon, then her vaginal entrance may be largely covered by her hymen. When the hymen - which is a thin area of tissue that is filled with tiny blood vessels - tears, a woman may or may not notice vaginal bleeding, and she may or may not feel discomfort or pain. Lack of Information The tearing of the hymen is not the only reason why a woman may feel discomfort or pain when she first starts having sex. Often times, women may experience uncomfortable sex due to a lack of information about sex. For example, by the time women first start having sex, they may have never learned that using a personal lubricant can make sex more comfortable or pleasurable. Or else they may not have learned that spending more time in foreplay before starting penetration can help a woman's body to create more natural vaginal lubrication, which can also make sex feel more comfortable and pleasurable. Ready To Have Sex? And while many adults often encourage young women and men to wait to have sex until they are older, until they are married or until they are in love, adults may not spend enough time talking to young women and men about some of the benefits of waiting until they are feeling ready to have sex. For example, when two people feel uncomfortable with each other and unsure how to talk to each other about sex, then the sex itself is perhaps less likely to feel comfortable or pleasurable. However, when two people feel comfortable talking to each other about sex, and have spent time considering the emotional and physical risks of having sex - and how they plan to deal with such risks - then they are better situated to experienced more relaxed, pleasurable, comfortable sex. Feeling Comfortable: Physically and Emotionally Before you begin having sex, you might consider ways that you can feel not just physically comfortable (such as through the use of a lubricant or taking your time to begin with gentle penetration), but also ways that you can feel emotionally comfortable with your sexual choices. You and your partner might ask each other about how having sex with affect your relationship, or your expectations for exclusivity, or your plans for reducing the risk of pregnancy or infection. Recommended Reading You can learn more about having sex and how to make it more comfortable by reading S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Progressive Sexuality Guide to Get You Through High School and College by Heather Corinna. Common,Problems,,Content,Type,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/sex-with-virgin-bleeding/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/sex-with-virgin-bleeding/#comments Mon, 28 Jul 2008 16:35:35 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://www.kinseyconfidential.org/2008/07/28/qa-bleeding-the-first-time/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/sex-with-virgin-bleeding/feed/ 0 3:41 It is true that sometimes a small amount of bleeding occurs during the first time - or first few times- that a woman has vaginal ... It is true that sometimes a small amount of bleeding occurs during the first time - or first few times- that a woman has vaginal intercourse. Usually the bleeding is due to tearing of a woman's hymen, which is a thin layer of tissue that's rich with blood vessels and may cover a portion of the vaginal entrance. The Hymen And Bleeding While nearly all girls are born with a hymen, the size of the hymen can vary greatly. Also, some women's hymens are gradually torn over the years due to self-masturbation, tampon use or sexual activities such as finger stimulation. As a result, by the time a woman first experiences intercourse, she may notice only small amounts of bleeding, or none at all. Others notice larger amounts of bleeding. Some couples continue with sex when bleeding occurs; others are more comfortable stopping and checking things out. Some women experience physical discomfort with early attempts at intercourse; others do not. These are reasons why it is important to continue checking in with each other. You might even choose to have sex on a towel or dark sheets if concerns about bleeding interfere with feeling relaxed and open to pleasure. Vaginal Tearing Bleeding can also be caused by vaginal tearing. A woman might notice this during sex or afterwards, or even the next. If at any time a woman feels discomfort, pain or has concerns about bleeding, she might consider checking in with her healthcare provider (which is recommended prior to becoming sexually active, anyway). Using Lubricant The risk of vaginal tearing may be reduced by using a store-bought lubricant during intercourse. It can be applied to a man's penis (over the condom) and to a woman's vaginal entrance, to make intercourse more comfortable. If you're using latex condoms, choose a water or silicone based lubricant. Lubricants can be incorporated into your sex play in fun, sexy, pleasurable ways. You can watch each other apply it to your own genitals, or take turns and apply it on each otherrsquo;s bodies. Safer, more comfortable sex can absolutely be enjoyable. Good Communication Regardless of your partner's level of experience, it can be good to ask each other questions like, Are you comfortable?, Shall we keep going?, Do you want to stop?, or How does this feel? Good communication can help you and your partner decide whether you want to continue sexual activities, try different things, vary your position or rhythm, or stop altogether. Before deciding to be sexual together, people often remember to ask each other important questions about sexually transmitted infections (STI) and condom use. However, they sometimes shy away from asking equally important questions about the emotional side of sex. Letting your partner know how you feel about sharing sexual experiences -- your values, expectations, excitement and concerns -- and asking how he or she feels in return can help deepen your relationship and bring you closer to developing the relationship you desire. Bodies,,Content,Type,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No