http://kinseyconfidential.org Just another WordPress weblog Fri, 06 Nov 2009 13:42:00 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.5 en hourly 1 © aschweig@indiana.edu () aschweig@indiana.edu() 1440 Just another WordPress weblog aschweig@indiana.edu No no http://kinseyconfidential.org/wp-content/themes/kinsey/images/kinsey-podcast-300.jpg http://kinseyconfidential.org 144 144 http://kinseyconfidential.org/overdue-list-fun-interesting-sexuality-links/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/overdue-list-fun-interesting-sexuality-links/#comments Fri, 06 Nov 2009 13:42:00 +0000 Natalie Ingraham (M.P.H.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/overdue-list-fun-interesting-sexuality-links/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/overdue-list-fun-interesting-sexuality-links/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/penetrative-sex-pergnant/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/penetrative-sex-pergnant/#comments Thu, 05 Nov 2009 14:00:05 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1256 http://kinseyconfidential.org/penetrative-sex-pergnant/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/sins-invalid/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/sins-invalid/#comments Wed, 04 Nov 2009 13:57:50 +0000 Natalie Ingraham (M.P.H.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/sins-invalid-sexuality-disability-theater-meet-sf/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/sins-invalid/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/sociological-imagination-introducing-eric-anthony-grollman/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/sociological-imagination-introducing-eric-anthony-grollman/#comments Tue, 03 Nov 2009 11:02:09 +0000 Eric Anthony Grollman (M.A.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/sociological-imagination-introducing-eric-anthony-grollman/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/sociological-imagination-introducing-eric-anthony-grollman/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/women-masturbate-lesbian/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/women-masturbate-lesbian/#comments Mon, 02 Nov 2009 14:00:41 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1255 http://kinseyconfidential.org/women-masturbate-lesbian/feed/ 0 3:16 Determining Sexual Orientation Great question! Although many people wonder if there is an easy way to know if a person is gay, straight, bisexual or some ... Determining Sexual Orientation Great question! Although many people wonder if there is an easy way to know if a person is gay, straight, bisexual or some other sexual orientation, the fact is that there is not. Many scientists consider a personrsquo;s sexual orientation to reflect a larger pattern of their romantic and sexual attractions such that women who identify as straight tend, for the most part, to be romantically and sexually attracted to men whereas women who identify as lesbian tend to be romantically and sexually attracted to women. Experiences, Thoughts, and Labels Don't Always Match Up Of course, few things in life are cut and dry and neither is sexual orientation. Some women who identify as heterosexual have explored sexually with other women. They may have kissed other women or engaged in oral sex, breast touching or genital touching with other women. Then again, some women who identify as heterosexual have never engaged in sexual activity with women in waking life, but they may have had pleasurable, satisfying sex dreams about women. Or, like you, they may find that their preferred fantasies during masturbation involve women. The fact that you get turned on thinking of other girls doesnrsquo;t minimize the fact that you also get turned on by your boyfriend. By the same token, many lesbian women have had some type of sexual contact with men. Some lesbian identified women may include men in their sexual fantasies or may have also had enjoyable sex dreams involving men. Just because a lesbian woman enjoys thinking about men or masturbating to images of men ndash; or images of men and women having sex together ndash; does not mean that her true orientation is heterosexual. Research About Sexual Attraction Pioneering sexuality researcher Dr. Alfred Kinsey suggested that sexuality was a rather fluid concept. He found that people sometimes experienced different sexual attractions at different points in their lives and that a personrsquo;s sexual behaviors, dreams and fantasies could vary. He also felt that, based on his research, more people would be attracted to both men and women if only society didnrsquo;t suppress these attractions. Labels Can Change Throughout Life Whether you identify as heterosexual, lesbian or bisexual is up to you. You may find that one label suits you well now and, later in life, you may find that a different sexual orientation label better reflects your feelings and attractions. However you decide to label yourself, try to let go of any stress or anxiety about how you ldquo;shouldrdquo; or ldquo;shouldnrsquo;trdquo; feel sexually. What you find arousing and exciting during your partnered sex play as well as during your masturbation fantasies is likely to keep evolving with time. By keeping an open and accepting mind toward your own experience, you can continue to explore your sexuality in positive ways. Content,Type,,Podcast,,Sexual,Orientation aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/iu-students-savage-love/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/iu-students-savage-love/#comments Fri, 30 Oct 2009 19:55:37 +0000 Marie Metelnick (M.A.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1271 http://kinseyconfidential.org/iu-students-savage-love/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/condoms-wetness-vagina/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/condoms-wetness-vagina/#comments Thu, 29 Oct 2009 14:00:17 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1254 http://kinseyconfidential.org/condoms-wetness-vagina/feed/ 0 3:42 You both make good points about condoms and lubrication. Rather than focusing on who is right, letrsquo;s take a step back and talk about condoms, ... You both make good points about condoms and lubrication. Rather than focusing on who is right, letrsquo;s take a step back and talk about condoms, vaginal lubrication and store-bought lube. The Benefits of Using Condoms Using condoms ndash; as you pointed out ndash; can have significant benefits. Using a condom during sex can greatly reduce the risk of passing several but not all sexually transmissible infections (STI) including HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea and the human papillomavirus (HPV). Condoms also offer good protection against pregnancy as they prevent sperm and egg from meeting. But yoursquo;re right that as protective as condoms can be, they sometimes make sex feel more dry. After all, sexual intercourse involves a great deal of friction as your penis moves in and out of her body. nbsp;Over time, the lubricant that comes on many lubricated condoms may not feel as though it is quite enough. If the condom gets to dry, there may be an increased risk of the condom breaking. Affect on Lubrication That said, many women ndash; and young women in particular ndash; lubricate sufficiently for comfortable, pleasurable vaginal sex. nbsp;But that doesnrsquo;t mean that there are never times when adding a little store-bought lubricant to her genitals or to the outside of the condoms can help sex to feel better for one or both partners. Sometimes vaginal lubrication feels reduced if a woman is on a low estrogen birth control pill, if she is taking certain medications or if she has just taken a warm bath or shower, which may slightly dry the vagina. nbsp;Other times couples donrsquo;t spent a lot of time in foreplay, or they decide to have a quickie, which may not leave sufficient time for a woman to produce much natural vaginal lubrication. Also, sometimes sex lasts for quite a long time ndash; so long that most women would not keep lubricating in amounts sufficient for comfortable sex or to protect against condom breakage. Adding Extra Lubrication As such, no matter how well lubricated your girlfriend may feel, it may be a good idea to keep some water-based or silicone-based lubricant on hand. Then, if sex feels as though it is becoming dry and you are worried about condom breakage or just feel that lubricant would make sex more pleasurable, you can add a small dab of lubricant to either one of your genitals. There are a variety of lubricant types on the market. Some adult stores and web sites sell sampler packs of water and silicone based lubricants so that women and men can find a lubricant that they like the feel of and that they donrsquo;t find irritating. Also, if condom safety is your main concern, you can also keep a second condom on hand. That way, if the first condom appears to dry out, you can stop intercourse, remove the first condom, put a new condom on, and then resume intercourse. More Information To learn more about sexual play involving condoms and lubricants, check out my book, Because It Feels Good: A Womanrsquo;s Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction. Common,Problems,,Content,Type,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/traditional-relationship-values-held-gender-sexuality/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/traditional-relationship-values-held-gender-sexuality/#comments Wed, 28 Oct 2009 11:00:47 +0000 Eric Anthony Grollman (M.A.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/traditional-relationship-values-held-gender-sexuality/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/traditional-relationship-values-held-gender-sexuality/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/regain-erection-quicker-orgasm/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/regain-erection-quicker-orgasm/#comments Mon, 26 Oct 2009 14:00:40 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1253 http://kinseyconfidential.org/regain-erection-quicker-orgasm/feed/ 0 3:24 Men Vs. Women Although menrsquo;s and womenrsquo;s bodies are similar in many ways (both sexes have two eyes, two ears, a nose, two legs, etc) there ... Men Vs. Women Although menrsquo;s and womenrsquo;s bodies are similar in many ways (both sexes have two eyes, two ears, a nose, two legs, etc) there are also some key differences. For example, not only do males and females vary in terms of their genitals ndash; the whole ldquo;boys have a penis and girls have a vaginardquo; ndash; but our genitals and sexual response work in different ways too. Refractory Period Unlike women (who are capable of multiple orgasms), men have whatrsquo;s called a refractory period which is the time between one ejaculation and their ability to ejaculate again. Young men, particularly those in their teens and twenties, can often have more than one ejaculation in a short period of time. Sometimes after sex that ends in ejaculation, a guy can keep having sex with only a slight decrease in the firmness of his erection. Mostly, though, it takes time for a man to get a second erection after he has already ejaculated (whether that ejaculation was from masturbation, oral sex, mutual masturbation, vaginal sex or anal sex). Sometimes it may only take a few moments but often it takes at least 15 or 30 minutes for men ndash; even young, college-aged men like yourself ndash; to get a second erection after they ejaculate. Welcome to your refractory period! As men age, their refractory period typically lengthens meaning that it often takes longer for men to get a second erection after they ejaculate. Some men may need to wait hours before they can ejaculate again or get a second erection. Other men may need to wait a day or longer. Can It Be Changed? There is no way to change onersquo;s refractory period and no special technique to being able to have multiple ejaculations in a short period of time. Some men pay attention to how their particular bodies work and may notice that itrsquo;s easier for them to become erect again if they are working out, eating well, getting sufficient sleep, abstaining from cigarettes or alcohol (both of which may impair menrsquo;s erectile function), or if they are feeling extremely mentally or physically aroused. Other times, men find it difficult to pinpoint any specific pattern to the way their erections work. Other Ways To Enjoy Each Other The good news is that pleasurable, enjoyable sex doesnrsquo;t always require an erection. Pleasurable sex isnrsquo;t always about intercourse or what some may think of as ldquo;normalrdquo; or ldquo;standardrdquo; sex. If you want to keep exploring each otherrsquo;s bodies, then whether or not you have a second erection, you and your partner can continue to kiss, to stimulate each othersrsquo; genitals with your hands, to massage each otherrsquo;s bodies all over, to play with sex toys or to lay in bed and talk and laugh. More Information You can learn more about menrsquo;s sexuality, including erections, ejaculation and enhancing sex play with a partner, in The New Male Sexuality. Content,Type,,Pleasure,amp;,Orgasm,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/inclusive-view-sexuality-race-gender-class-age/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/inclusive-view-sexuality-race-gender-class-age/#comments Fri, 23 Oct 2009 11:00:12 +0000 Eric Anthony Grollman (M.A.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/inclusive-view-sexuality-race-gender-class-age/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/inclusive-view-sexuality-race-gender-class-age/feed/ 1 http://kinseyconfidential.org/break-before-second-round-sex/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/break-before-second-round-sex/#comments Thu, 22 Oct 2009 13:00:32 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1242 http://kinseyconfidential.org/break-before-second-round-sex/feed/ 0 2:31 As long as two people are feeling comfortable and ready to have a second round of sex, there is no need for them to wait ... As long as two people are feeling comfortable and ready to have a second round of sex, there is no need for them to wait any certain length of time before they have sex again. If your partnerrsquo;s body feels tender, sore or irritated then you may want to delay having sex until another day when she or he is feeling more comfortable, ready and interested in having sex again. That said, if your partner wants to jump back into a second round of sex only moments after the first time that you two had sex, thatrsquo;s okay too. Erections Can Stay Firm When men are younger, such as in their teens and twenties, they are often able to get an erection that is firm enough for intercourse even minutes after they have sex. On occasion, they may not even become soft again after they first ejaculate ndash; they may maintain some level of hardness for several minutes or longer and continue having sex. Again, if you and your partner are able to have sex a second or third time in a short period of time, and you both want to, then there is no reason that you have to wait. Tools of the Trade If you use condoms to reduce your risk of pregnancy or infection, make sure to have multiple condoms on hand in case you decide to have sex more than once. If sex lasts for a long time or you anticipate having sex more than once, you may want to keep a bottle of lubricant on hand to help make sex more comfortable and pleasurable for your and your partner. Find Out More Sex can be enormously fun and it can be exciting to have sex more than once in a short period of time. Some couples feel as though they cannot get enough of each other and the chance to re-connect physically can feel very pleasurable. To learn more about sexual pleasure, choosing lubricants and sex techniques, check out Because It Feels Good: A Womanrsquo;s Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction. Content,Type,,Pleasure,amp;,Orgasm,,Podcast aschweig@indiana.edu no No http://kinseyconfidential.org/kinsey-institute-presents-conversations-sex-research/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/kinsey-institute-presents-conversations-sex-research/#comments Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:00:20 +0000 Eric Anthony Grollman (M.A.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/kinsey-institute-presents-conversations-sex-research/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/kinsey-institute-presents-conversations-sex-research/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/book-explains-women-sexsort/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/book-explains-women-sexsort/#comments Tue, 20 Oct 2009 06:07:45 +0000 Natalie Ingraham (M.P.H.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1225 http://kinseyconfidential.org/book-explains-women-sexsort/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/test-find-out-bisexual/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/test-find-out-bisexual/#comments Mon, 19 Oct 2009 13:00:27 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1245 http://kinseyconfidential.org/test-find-out-bisexual/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/vulvagraphics-honor-female-genital-diversity/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/vulvagraphics-honor-female-genital-diversity/#comments Thu, 15 Oct 2009 21:29:31 +0000 Jennifer Bass (M.P.H.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1247 http://kinseyconfidential.org/vulvagraphics-honor-female-genital-diversity/feed/ 0 http://kinseyconfidential.org/how-long-should-sex-last/ http://kinseyconfidential.org/how-long-should-sex-last/#comments Thu, 15 Oct 2009 13:00:59 +0000 Dr. Debby Herbenick (M.P.H., Ph.D.) http://kinseyconfidential.org/?p=1237 http://kinseyconfidential.org/how-long-should-sex-last/feed/ 0 3:12 Many men feel pressure in regard to their sexual performance with a partner. As a result, one of the more common questions that we get ... Many men feel pressure in regard to their sexual performance with a partner. As a result, one of the more common questions that we get about sex has to do with learning to last longer during sex. Masturbating to Pornography Yoursquo;re not alone in feeling as though your quick ejaculation during masturbation while watching porn may be influenced by years of feeling as though you had to hurry up so that you didnrsquo;t get caught. Quite a lot of men attribute their quick ejaculation to feeling as though they needed to come quickly before someone found them masturbating or watching porn. How Long Sex Lasts The fact that you can last as long as 5 or 10 minutes during masturbation without porn is encouraging. In spite of common myths about sex, itrsquo;s common or sex to last for less than 15 minutes. Some couples spend 1 or 2 minutes in intercourse, others spend closer to 5 minutes, and some last for 10 minutes, 20 minutes or longer. With experience and practice, men often find that they can increase their control over the timing of their ejaculation. Exercises to Try At home, you can practice the stop-start and squeeze techniques during masturbation. This is how they work: begin by stimulating yourself as usual. Then, just before you get to the point of no return ndash; when you will ejaculate no matter what ndash; either stop all stimulation to your penis by removing your hand (for the stop-start technique) or gently squeeze the head of your penis (for the squeeze technique). Then, as your arousal starts to subside a little, begin stimulating your penis again and then repeat the cycle. As you try these exercises, pay attention to the sensations in your penis, scrotum or in other parts of your body. What types of feelings do you notice as you get closer to feeling as though you are going to ejaculate? Some men notice a twitch in their leg muscles or a feeling in the area of their scrotum. Others notice their penis getting exceptionally hard as their excitement builds. With practice, you can learn to notice these sensations and then back off a little during masturbation or sex by staying still, stopping all stimulation ndash; or when having sex with a partner ndash; by removing your penis and taking a few seconds off before re-inserting it or trying a new sex positions. Learn More You can learn more about ejaculation and menrsquo;s sexuality in The New Male Sexuality which highlights several additional tips and techniques for lasting longer during sex. You can learn more about this book and others on our Kinsey Confidential web site. Content,Type,,Homepage,Featured,,Pleasure,amp;,Orgasm,,Podcast,,Special aschweig@indiana.edu no No